Big question. So, should you keep him or her as your friend after a break up from facebook dating app ?
What about after the dust clears and emotions settle down – good idea? Bad idea?
I used to use that as a pick-up line believe it or not. Instead of approaching a chick and asking her if she was tired because she had been running through my mind all night and day, I used to ask chicks their opinion on being friends with an ex. It was a great way to open a set (ie. engage conversation cold-turkey with a girl), and they certainly loved giving their opinions on the subject. Generally guys were cool with the notion of being friends with an ex, but weren’t fans with their girlfriends doing the same. Girls however more often than not were against the idea and often did not keep talking with their ex-boyfriends. They sure as hell didn’t want their current boyfriends to still be talking to their ex-girlfriends.
Personally I think it’s myopic to have a black and white answer on this. In many cases a relationship doesn’t work out for reasons that still make it possible to keep a platonic relationship. Relationships don’t work out for a million reasons and I find it impossible to believe that in every one of those reasons two people can’t remain friends, especially if they started off as friends before becoming romantic.
From my own perspective I have initially remained friends with ex-girlfriends. What usually happens though is when they get a new guy, they suddenly cut off communication. But I realize that’s because most girls get re-programmed when they get a new dick in them – that’s a different blog post altogether though! With the girlfriends I have remained friends with I have later found out they still fostered some deep feelings for me including one who 6 years later still wanted to get back together with me on the eve of her wedding! (Yeah, I know I’m awesome and all). Ultimately though, my friendship with her ended when her abusive and alpha-male wannabee husband threatened to kill me since he was so jealous of her keeping in touch with me.
So now that I finish this article I can’t say that I am currently friends with any exes, except for a few which I just dated, but was not in a full blown relationship with. Ultimately though I still stand beside my premise that it is okay to remain friends with an ex, depending on the situation. If you’re wanting to remain friends only because you’re hoping there is a chance in the future, that may be a bad idea. On the other hand if you’re legitimately over them and you’re both willing to move in separate directions romantically, it’s always good to have good people in your life. That’s all I have to say about that.